Jackie Chan Adventures Part I - Mr. Wartortle Goes to Washington

After a deep slog through the trash swamp, it’s thrilling to reach dry land with Jackie Chan Adventures. We’re beginning a new arc that’s all Jackie, all the time, as he fights the mob with his dope fictional family.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
It’s party time in the Jersey garage • Jade’s precociousness is surprisingly palatable • No mobster wants to kill real, actual Jackie Chan • Chinese Medicine Soup? More like Chinese TALISMAN soup • We’re not big fans of all the statue-shaming about Shendu • You kiss your Wartortle with that mouth?

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Revenge Chocolate™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Jackie Chan Adventures Episode 1, “The Dark Hand”

• Jackie Chan Adventures Episode 2, “The Power Within”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

Patreon Poll Special - Dungeons & Dragons

Our Patrons have once again taken the reins and steered our podcast horses back to Dungeons & Dragons, a TV show about a carnival ride about a game that, according to Pastor Steve, forged my unbreakable bond with Satan.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Rory’s highest concept yet might run us afoul of Drew Carey • The Adventures of Melba Toast Man • Eric is a Difficult Person • Bogbeast? Horny teen? There’s an ancient prophecy for that • The magic hat is even more precocious than the already chaotic-neutral Dungeon Master • Apparently there’s like tons of children born of Stargazer ilk, making prophecies everywhere just steamed

Today’s Episode Sponsor: (Council of) Council of Dads (A Council of Dads Fancast)™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Dungeons & Dragons Episode 6, “Beauty and the Bogbeast”

• Dungeons & Dragons Episode 21, “Child of the Stargazer”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

Council of Council of Dads: A Council of Dads Fancast

Spring is a time of joyous rebirth. The Childish Podbaby Saturday Morning Tuesdays is gone, and now we proudly present our adult Podfather about NBC’s hit new drama, Council of Dads. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll dad your pants.

March Madness Champion: Hulk Hogan(‘s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling)

You can’t do a March Madness bracket without choosing a winner, so we gave the fifth week of March to our triumphant toon of choice: Hulk Hogan’s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling. Will two new episodes with the Hulkster live up to his infamous horse adventure?

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
The 19 Skeletons of Doctor Covid • Junkyard Dog has terraformed the perfect nest for his clutch of Junkyard Eggs • Wrestle to the death for the enjoyment of Roman Emperor Rory • It turns out you can just rip off Ghostbusters all you want • The monster version of Andre the Giant is just Andre the Giant • let’s go to the wrap-up

Today’s Episode Sponsor: A Clown With Two Boats™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Hulk Hogan’s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling S2E10a, “Junkyard Dog's Junkyard Dog”

• Hulk Hogan’s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling S2E11, “Ghost Wrestlers”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

March Madness Round Four - Speed Racer

Here he comes, here comes Speed Racer: the fast drivin’, fast talkin’ ‘60s anime dreamboat. Racing is a sport too, jocks, even if Speed still spends most of his time karate-chopping gangsters and expressing loud gasps.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Leave an adult tooth under your memory foam pillow for Father Themes • One of these “quirks” is not like the others • Please, ‘Mr. Racer’ was my father • Nothing good ever happens in a volcano lair • “Car Wrestling” is exactly like people wrestling, but the cars are the people wrestling

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Chump Salad™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Speed Racer Episode 44, “Race the Laser Tank”

• Speed Racer Episode 45, “The Great Car Wrestling Match”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

March Madness Round Three - Mighty Ducks / Eyeshield 21

We had to get a sports anime in the March Madness lineup, so enjoy American Football drama Eyeshield 21, complete with guns and vampire elves. Then we hit the ice with Disney’s Mighty Ducks, which is, of course, about hockey monsters from space.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
A hockey team manager returns us to the Disney School of Contract Law • Space Hockey is like regular hockey, but you get to kill for sport • It’s extremely cathartic to see a football team relegated to “anime club” levels on the high school food chain • Austin waggles a pinkie toe into the waters of the Anime Dungeon and likes how it feels • Andy wishes he could BE anime

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Sexual Home Improvement™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Mighty Ducks Episode 20, “Mad Quacks: Beyond Hockeydome”

• Eyeshield 21 Episode 1, “The Man with the Lightning Legs”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

March Madness Round Two - Sport Billy / Hulk Hogan’s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling

Suit up for Round Two of our March Madness arc! We wistfully recall those classic sports plotlines you all know and love, like saving King Arthur from a soccer-hating witch, or having a horse show up at your apartment.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Sport Billy would rather elevate a dog to knighthood than acknowledge a woman • Don’t bother getting excited about a juicy Sir Gawain cameo • Hulksters and horses don’t mix • Junkyard Fries are a treat to be savored • Andre the Giant is serious about oral hygiene

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Captain Sully Simulator™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Sport Billy Episode 1, “Joust in Time”

• Hulk Hogan’s Rock ‘n’ Wrestling Episode 2, “The Four-Legged Pickpocket”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

March Madness Round One - ProStars (w/Dave Rappoccio)

When it’s March Madness season, there’s only one course of action: vaguely sports-adjacent cartoons! To kick off Round One, we’ve enlisted sports cartoonist Dave “Highway Baby“ Rappoccio for an expert opinion on the dunktastic voyage of 1991’s ProStars (It’s All About Helpin’ Kids).

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Wayne Gretzky has all the personality of a walking hockey puck • A beleaguered writer’s room scrambles to make a floating basketball look like a cool weapon • Your dad left because you’re not good at sports • What is “a cartoon you wouldn’t expect to have harmful Jewish stereotypes,” Alex • Bo Jackson can grow and shrink to fill any room he occupies like a gas

Today’s Episode Sponsor: The Tennessee Turtle™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• ProStars Episode 1, “The Slugger Returns”

• ProStars Episode 2, “Short John’s Revenge”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Fabulous Guest: Dave Rappoccio (Portland)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

Patreon Poll Special - DuckTales

The votes are in, and the winner of our first Patreon poll goes to nostalgic 80s darling DuckTales, starring Walt Disney self-insert OC Scrooge McDuck. (If you, too, want to dictate what cartoons we watch, all you gotta do is help us fill our very own money bin)

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Austin tries to use our podcast to launch his Broadway career • Barbara Walters impressions are still lame in 2020 • A moratorium on crows with hats • Stinky Uncle Catfish revives our old nemesis, contract law • Elephants are the world’s most untapped labor force

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Ken Doll But With Realistic Parts™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• DuckTales Episode 6, “Send in the Clones”

• DuckTales Episode 61, “Once Upon A Dime”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

Special - Daria (w/Amalia Larson)

We’re joined in the studio once again by Amalia “Soap Toes” Larson to examine MTV’s patron saint of Generation X, Daria. So crank up the grunge, slam a pog, shred your denim, and remember those who bravely fought in the Boomer Uprising of ‘97.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Men really ought to add some entertainment features ~down there~ • The Vengaboys are coming to claim your bananas • Justice for Quinn Morgendorfer • The best days end with a bonus sock • If your teen has low self-esteem, you probably haven’t yelled at them enough

Today’s Episode Sponsor: The 2020 Alvin and the Chipmunks Convention™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Daria Episode 1, “Esteemsters”

• Daria Episode 2, “The Invitation”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Fabulous Guest: Amalia Larson (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

Greeced Frightening Part II - The Ballad of Plum Boy

As punishment from the gods for our hubris, we’re cursed with a second week of ancient Greek nonsense in the form of Class of the Titans (2005) and Mythic Warriors: Guardians of the Legend (1998). Hear us roll the boulder up the hill and maybe this time, fingers crossed, it’ll stay at the top.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Much like the Wet Sagging trend, everything is damp, confusing, and kinda hot • Hercules hates poison • More like Jerkules • The Greek gods use the classic “your kids sure are teen astronauts now” defense • A monster with legs that are two snakes is a real box-checker for us

Today’s Episode Sponsor: The Whisper Bag™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Mythic Warriors: Guardians of the Legend Season 2, Episode 4, “Hercules and the Golden Apples”

• Class of the Titans Episode 1, “Chaos 101”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

Greeced Frightening Part I - Bummer’s Odyssey

We’ve made some bad decisions in the past, but they pale in comparison to our choice to watch Ulysses 31 and Spartakus & the Sun Beneath the Sea as an ongoing arc. How much joke potential lies in Greek myth cartoons? Well, accept this free big wood horse as a gift and find out!

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
We’ve hit a new basement on watchable content and we don’t have an escape plan • Chicken Bone Andy has no mouth and must scream • Uleesees has the rootinest tootinest bangs in the galaxy • Spartakus consistently takes all the fun out of doing drugs • The foppish judges are kinda fun though

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Trumpet Berries™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Ulysses 31 Episode 1, “Vengeance of the Gods”

• Spartakus and the Sun Beneath the Sea Episode 2, “Living Crystal”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

Special - Visionaries: Knights of the Magical Light

Sometimes a show comes along that unites us in our desire to utterly and completely destroy it, and this time it’s 1987’s Visionaries: Knights of the Magical Light. Join Merklynn the Centrist Wizard as he foists powers upon the ruling class in return for vague favors. Chaos, naturally, ensues.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Dirty nuts, clean nuts, you know I’ve had my share • No sooner is Merklynn done with his 20 minute explanation of the show than the Spectral Knights immediately disappoint us with their poor judgement • The eternal tale of a man and his trapdoor into our hearts • The power discrepancy between heroes and villains demands a balance patch

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Dad’s Old Big Box of Cables™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Visionaries Episode 1, “The Age of Magic Begins”

• Visionaries Episode 2, “The Dark Hand of Treachery”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

PokéClones Part IV - Behind Blue Eyes, White Dragon (w/Kyle Danger Henick)

Only two shows stand between us and our goal of becoming PokéClone masters: Monster Rancher and Yu-Gi-Oh! With the help of Kyle “The Cliff Racer from Morrowind” Henick, we unlock our disks and trust the heart of the cards, even if it eventually destroys us. Let’s d-d-d-d-D-D-D-D-D-DISCUSS!

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Young Genki learns to raid his parents’ CD library for Huey Lewis unlockables • The PokeRap doesn’t belong in the middle of a show • It’s anyone’s guess why the Teen CEO needs to be in school • Grandpa has a hard time with the 4DX theater experience • Yugi Moto lives in an opulent future where people are paid to design intricate holograms for teen showdowns

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Cranberries Up!™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Monster Rancher Episode 1, “In The Beginning”

• Yu-Gi-Oh! Episode 1, “The Heart of the Cards”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Fabulous Guest: Kyle Danger Henick (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

PokéClones Part III - The Passion of the Long Boys

Our hunt to catch all the PokéClones continues with the regrettable localization of Cardcaptor Sakura and the deeply problematic “Human Pokémon” of Zatch Bell. The anime dungeon seals are broken, and the Dawn of the Long Boys has begun.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Andy opens his goat mouth to scream an anime curse • Everyone has full crushes on Julian, the boy of unsurpassed length • Sakura definitely cannot catch all the Clow cards in just her jammies • Whose job was it to animate briefs onto Gash’s jeepers • Skateboarding incels are slightly more fun?

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Jake Gyllenhaal-Bot, Channel Five™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Cardcaptors Episode 1, “One Fateful Day”

• Zatch Bell Episode 1, “The Lightning Boy From Another World”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

PokéClones Part II - Bakugan in 60 Seconds

This week we’re exploring the first wave of PokéClones with Bakugan, Dinosaur King, Fighting Foodons, and Beyblade. Four shows with varying quality of catchable monsters, yet strangely consistent on slammable dads and the soft foods they crave.

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Rad Danny Japan and the Marbles of Destiny • Anyway, here’s Wonderwall • Spike Taylor blows in twice a year to knock his wife’s socks off • We’d like to arrest a computer for being too boy-horny • Honestly who cares about the family sword-dragon when there’s tops to rip

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Bakugan Battle Brawlers Episode 1, “Bakugan: The Battle Begins”

• Dinosaur King Episode 1, “Prehistory in the Making”

• Fighting Foodons Episode 1, “Rice to Meet You”

• Beyblade Episode 1, “The Blade Raider”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)

PokéClones Part I - Patreon, I Choose You!

It’s our Season 4 Premiere! We’ve started a new arc about the most capitalist cartoons known to man, and so we think it’s fitting to also shamelessly promote our new Patreon. Fact: Pikachu is a patron of ours, and he LOVES our bonus content

This week on Saturday Morning Tuesdays:
Gary and his cheerleader squad begin a boy’s journey of deep emasculation • Ash’s Mom and Professor Oak are definitely playing Hide the Diglett • Austin’s already feeling the Capitalist’s Itch • Officer Jenny’s clone hegemony makes Rory uncomfortable • Pikachu gets real surgery and almost dies and gets a funny battery instead of medicine

Today’s Episode Sponsor: Jello Fellows™

THIS WEEK'S EPISODES

• Pokémon Episode 1, “Pokémon, I Choose You!”

• Pokémon Episode 2, “Pokémon Emergency!”

The Boys: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle), Austin Bridges (Portland), Rory Voie (Seattle)
Audio Production: Andrew Eric Davison (Seattle)